I really thought I wouldn’t like this one. It sat in my to-do pile for ages until Goshzilla gave me the evil eye and growled something about chronology, whatever that means. So I popped it in and expected a bore fest. You can’t blame me, it’s a thriller of all things. I’d raise the issue that we don’t even have a thriller section here, but he was hearing none of it.

It stars the woman from Happy Gilmore and Traci Lords, better known for her brief pursuit into the techno music business. I don’t think she did any of the music, rather just sang, so it’s one of the great ironies of our time that the one song that made it onto the Mortal Kombat soundtrack was an instrumental edit.

That aside, it doesn’t take long for the movie to get very bloody. I thought everything was going to stay on an intellectual level, but fortunately, we get to the good stuff fast. Al, the jerk of a boyfriend (playing up the stereotype WAY too much), comes home to verbally abuse his girlfriend and try to steal money from her debit card. After a few volleys of words, she turns around while making dinner and guts him right there. Just as she realizes he didn’t trip on the floor, but rather painted the kitchen a new coat of cherry red, the friend shows up, and there’s not a whole lot of time to hide the evidence. Thus they scheme a way to get rid of the body and blame it all on bad karma. Al has enough baggage to provide plenty of reasons why he wouldn’t be around anymore, so case closed.

After dropping him at the zoo into what they hope was a lion’s cage, they head home only to be greeted by the police some time later. He informs them that Al was brutally mauled to death by penguins, causing Lord’s character to do a spit take. Well with smoke, but I don’t think smoke-take is a proper term. Anyway, Al has no family, so they don’t really bother looking into the death, and somehow the large stab wound blended into the hundred of beak peckings.

All is well, but they feel so good about being free from the burden, that they decide to help their friend who has a domineering and chauvinistic boss. While they’re at it, they also notice a mortician who gets a little too friendly with the corpses, so he may as well go too. But when does it end, and will all this killing cause them to band together or split apart.

So I did end up liking the movie; it was produced well save for the camera that didn’t feel like staying in focus half the time. I didn’t get bored like I had originally thought, so job well done.